In light of the ridiculous “Native” inspired cultural detritus I have found lately, and because there are too many instances in daily life to exclaim, “What the Fuck!?” I have created a new category appropriately titled: What the Fuck!?

Our first entrant in this category was the jury panel for Tribeca’s All Access program. You may recall it included Adam Beach and some lesser known non-movie involved types like Damon Dash. Anyway, let’s add this old battleaxe of a blonde, photograher Doris Kloster. Evidently her “sexy” ourvre is popular in Japan. Figures….a sampling of her “work” can be found here, Shit.

The more interesting photos on the site, specfically because they are so ill-conceived and executed, are the self-portraits which claim to reference the, “iconic presence of women in visual interpretations of current world events.” Really? How does a be-feathered Indian girl figure into current world events? Had Doris attended the Miss Indian World pageant at GON this year, and thus obtained her inspiration? Because the last time I hung out with Indian chicks, which was, like, three weeks ago, none of them were wearing feathered head-dresses or wielding corn-of the cob variety.

Perhaps Doris is being ironic? Perhaps that cob is representative of her preferred dildo size and texture? It’s probably organic, the corn, maybe even the feathers, are of the eagle variety. Nothing is more organic than Native Americans and corn. Anyway, she is known for her fetish photography and naughty “video art” so none of this is too far-fetched. It is possible to fetishize anything, right? Her suggestive proffering of the cob (in the none too subtle “Land O Lakes” manner), to you the viewer/voyeur, intimates her fantasy: it will be shoved firmly up her rather large ass where her work gurgitates then rush releases into the artworld, shit that it is. And, the feathers? Why to tickle her with, silly! I mean duh! She is the first lady of sexy fetish photography!

For more of Doris’ dumb-assisms: www.doriskloster.com

We dare you to pop a boner!